N38 – One Whore, Soap and a Sleigh

TWSS – “She’s got a big one.”

 

The Good:

“Who knows how to play the skin flute?”

That was a surprisingly filthy comment from that lady while on stage but  Lil Ren’s no hesitation response of “I do!”, had me laughing so hard.

Out of context: “I know that’s beef”

Meeting more really cool people. Another bunny, though he’s almost a Hare. Random things, call and response. 1. “I call my tampons little mice.” 2. “I’m glad I swallowed.” 3. “I said NEVER” (said no woman, ever)

That last was hilariously funny to me for some reason.

Story

When I was 15, I got into a little trouble with er, “the authoritas” and had to do some community service. The other kid assigned to the same project was also a naughty little teen. We weren’t exactly well supervised. He was the second boy I’d ever *tongue-kissed* (gawd, the phrasing we used! Just terrible) But wow, did we ever have some hot make-out sessions!. What I remember the most, besides all the wonderful new sensations of arousal and wickedness (tee hee), was how nice kissing him was.

He was very skilled, it turns out. I figured that out later as I have NEVER AGAIN had someone kiss me like that. A few have come close though, so that’s good. Most men use too much tongue, too much force, too much drool, or not enough force/tongue/maneuvers/whatever. (Kissing women for me is like comparing bananas to peaches. That’s a wholly different pleasure there.)

I wish I could be kissed like that again. Every crush I have, I fantasize about that. A couple of my current infatuations have some rather delectable looking mouths and lips so my imagination has been working overtime.

The Bad:

Lonely nights, feeling left out. Harmonica playing goats. Wishing I knew how to get along with people for real.

The Ugly:

That moment when someone makes a random drunken confession and you wish to God you could agree but if you did that mean *actually* opening yourself up. People think I have no secrets and while it’s true that I have no filter, I keep my true hopes and fears deeply buried. I will tell everyone, even perfect strangers a shit-ton of bad things about me, and that’s on purpose. It’s a really horrid defense mechanism so that they won’t like me and won’t expect too much because I know I’ll eventually disappoint or hurt them. But all that is the trivial stuff, no matter how serious the topic is, it’s not that serious for me.

But damn it,  how I wish I could freely admit some of my hopes. It never was and never could be a good idea. I am just waiting impatiently for the sand to run out and both chance and choice are gone.

I just have so much ANGER

Theme Songs
  • Spiderwebs – No Doubt
  • Kissing You- Color Me Badd
  • The Joker – Steve Miller Band
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